Comic Relief has come and gone in another haze of shameless self-publicity, rattling buckets and Graham sodding Norton. The overriding theme this year was "do something funny for money" (screw a fat prostitute?), but the real theme, as with every year, was to do something a bit wacky. This entails normally very sensible people doing something a bit odd in the hope that it makes them hilarious. It doesn't. Shaving half a beard off? Comedy platinum. Wearing a silly hat to work and then giggling your way through a meeting because - look - it's got a flashing light: Not even a little bit amusing. Describing yourself or your friends as wacky or any of the associated ...

The BBC's annual business-dick-a-thon is back, and with it a new army of gurning, money crazed muppets ready to do Business. To prepare you for the abject horror that you'll get from seeing these people smarming their way across your screen, the BBC have printed up a dick-by-dick guide.  Try to spot who will be eliminated in week three and you'll have no recollection of, which one will endear themselves to the Daily Mail by being just middle-class enough, and who refuses to be fired, confusing Sir Alan by telling him that he is fired. Anita Shah Hilariously, her personal quote reads like an excerpt from a children's book, and she has the audacity to call herself articulate.  It's an annoying staccato style, ...

Quiz shows used to be so simple:  Question, answer, prize. Question, answer, prize. Gamble? Ooh, you've lost the lot.  Let's rub into your face just what a Thicky McThickerson you are by showing you just what you could have won. People showing off became boring (unless they're showing off properly on University Challenge), and so it was decided that quizzes ned a gimmick.  Who Wants to be a Millionaire? offered you the chance to win £32,000.  The Weakest Link asked you to argue with your team mates and pick on them for getting questions wrong, even if they're about 16th century literature and you're just a student that wanted to argue back with Anne Robinson for a laugh. Eggheads (BBC2) is a ...

Never before have there been so many flimsy excuses to liberate you of your hard-earned.  Beggars in the street, definitely not buying drugs; badly worded missives from African Princes offering a share of their fortunes; Sex phone-lines, text messages, picture messages, hand-jobs, web-cams and participate-at-home masturbatathon channels. Drunk people are always an easy target for carefully making them a couple of pounds lighter, hence the old women selling manky roses for a quid to guys trying to impress someone they've just pulled, taxi drivers taking the scenic route home and nightclubs charging £15 to get in and £4 for a bottle of warm beer. Getting drunk has a terrible effect on money counting abilities, especially when trying to pick through a handful ...

I was amazed and pleased that Adrian Chiles decided to call out Steve Bruce on MOTD 2 over his ludicrous assertion that the defeat to Chelsea was somehow aided by the referee missing fouls in the lead up to both goals.  The first took place a full two minutes before the goal (and is debatable - definitely not a clear-cut foul), and Wigan had several opportunities to clear their lines, and the second was so soft as to be laughable.  In fact, Chiles may even have laughed. He might as well slate the referee for giving a goal-kick instead of a corner in the first minute, because that would have altered the entire game in a very subtle way and maybe ...